As a woman in the mela camp I think I can speak not only for myself, but all of my sisters, about our men. We are so grateful for their presence. We out number them almost three to one which makes us even more appreciative. They are rare jewels.
When women are not allowed to leave our camp we are requested to have at least one of the men from our camp to accompany us. They graciously accompany us with good humor, respect, and compassionate understanding of our needs. They are patient and kind and we simply could not function without them.
In addition to our mela group men, I’m also grateful for the Indian men that travel with us as our guides. They translate, help us count our rupees and remind us it’s not worth bargaining over a few cents. They tolerate our shopping much better than most American men and are always looking out for us. Without them this trip would simply not be possible for us. Through their protection, we are afforded access to places many Indian women would not be able to go.
So if any of you sisters have one of those “few good men” in your life comment/brag back about him below. He is a rare jewel!
Namaste Jude
Yes, a few good men I have met and indeed I live with one. He is kind, and loving and caring and respectful. But that was not always the case, for I have felt the terror of living with those who take pleasure in murdering the soul. The contrast makes it all that much more special – to feel the tenderness of the caring heart – the respect of his approach. I am real around him. He around me. No pretenses here. There are no hidden agendas, no places in our souls we cannot explore. The deepest crevices, the layers of life folded onto each other, we can reach, touch together. There is peace in knowing it is so safe and joy in feeling the connection. It has not always been so. I know I am lucky for seeing that, having that, living that. You asked if I feel lucky those first days on your journey. Yes. Yes I do. For that connection with the good man and all we have created together. For connections in general that involve some very special people. Relationships that heal my heart when it aches. Relationships that spurt out love enough to stop the bleeding of open wounds. I am lucky in knowing you and being around those that surround you. Lucky in sharing this trip of a lifetime with you. At some point though the self cries out and I know I must be one with myself – make that connection with self and no one else. Inside I hear my soul needing to separate. As much as we want those unions with others, those companionships, we understand the significance of the true union with our deeper selves. We understand the sense of urgency in connecting, with and by yourself. In quiet moments, alone except for the company of our many memories, we connect with that “good woman”. I am lucky that I have tamed the fear of “just being” with the good woman inside, seeing the good and the bad without necessarily judging, letting go of self hate, letting go of what “should” be to be with just what is. It has not always been so. I am lucky for I have grown. The good man has to be put aside for that. A teacher of mine once told me though that “there is a good woman somewhere in every good man”. So as you appreciate all that the “good men” are doing, I know you are adding so much to their “goodness”…..They are the lucky ones. Oh but how I have rambled on. Grammar you say??? Hey hope you stay with those good men and stay safe, happy, and wonderfully fed with love and kindness. I miss you and wish you the very best. May this time with self, bring you closer to that good woman within….as well as the good men.
Namaste, Liliana